Lemon Flip

Edward’s heated gaze sent shivers up my spine as I made my way down the aisle. He looked sinful in his black button down with the sleeves rolled up and black slacks. I had to tell myself a few times as I walked that attacking him at the ceremony wasn’t a good idea.

Jessica had been right; the man did look at me like he was undressing me with his eyes. Then again, passion I’d never thought I’d possessed had been directed at my soldier. My Soldier. Just thinking that Edward was interested in me at all was still a shock. When I’d pulled him into that back room, I wasn’t sure if he’d be disgusted by my actions or not. So, I had been surprised to find that he felt the same way.

Ever since we’d decided to act on our mutual attraction, it was like the floodgates had been opened. We spent as much time together as we could, and it sometimes spilled into work hours, much to James’ annoyance. I was sure he hadn’t thought through his plan to get us together thoroughly, but no one could have expected what would happen when we finally did.

It was like fireworks were erupting around us every time we kissed, and man, could Edward kiss. I always suspected he had a commanding nature because he’d been a sergeant in the Army…but fuck me.
The sexual chemistry between us wasn’t the only thing that attracted me to Edward, though. His protective nature made me feel safer than I had in a long time. When he had gone out to kick the mystery knocker’s ass the other night, I’d been scared…but not for myself. Edward had become someone I’d come to love dearly in such a short period of time, and I knew that if something happened to him, it would devastate me. I’d already lost one person close to me—I knew I couldn’t bear to lose him, as well.

He was one of the sweetest men I’d ever met and the toughest. It was a strange combination that was just…Edward. I enjoyed spending time with him, just goofing around or talking.

I shook myself out of my thoughts as I reached the makeshift altar. Having the wedding outside in the only park in Forks had been a great idea. Rose had suggested an outdoor wedding offhandedly months before, and Emmett and I had made it happen. I’d known from talks her and I’d had when we were younger that getting married under the open sky was something she had always wanted.

A large, white tent covered the area the ceremony would be held. There were thirty chairs on each side of the aisle covered in white fabric for the guests to sit in; the aisle itself was covered with a white runner. At the altar, an archway covered an array of fall-colored day lilies stood behind the wedding party. Emmett, and the rest of his groomsmen, were dressed in black slacks, white button downs, and black ties. It was simple but something the couple had decided on from the start. They were not interested in overly-fancy clothes. Rose and Emmett were simple people who were more concerned about tying themselves together.

Taking my place next to Rosalie’s other bridesmaids, I looked to the back of the tent. The music changed, and Rose appeared on the arm of her father. She was a vision in her sleeveless lace dress. They walked slowly toward us, even though she’d worn flats. Falling down while everyone had their eyes on her had been a huge concern, but not the only one.

She’d asked Charlie if she could borrow me from the bar for an hour for “important wedding business” the other night. It was just an excuse to get me away to talk. We went upstairs and as soon as the door closed, she started freaking out on me.

“I can’t do this, Bella,” Rosalie’s lip trembled.

“Huh?” was my brilliant reply. “What are you talking about?”

“I can’t marry Emmett. What was I thinking? He’s such a wonderful man, and I’m going to embarrass him on our wedding day. He’s going to end up finding someone that is beautiful, confident, and doesn’t trip over air. I don’t deserve him,” she wailed, throwing her head back.

“Just stop right there.” I placed my hand on her shoulder, causing her to look at me. “I will not listen to you talk about my best friend like that. She’s gorgeous, but refuses to see it. She is the kindest person I know and will knock out anyone that hurts her loved ones, even if she is shy. And…who gives a damn if she can’t walk a straight line? Everyone needs a quirk, and that’s hers.”

After my speech, we’d talked for another couple of hours. By the time Rose had been ready to go, she’d finally accepted that she had deserved Emmett. I had been so proud of her. Even if she had been blind to how great she really was, she’d at least acknowledged that she had been worthy of marrying the man of her dreams.

When she reached Emmett, her smile was as big as his. The love that showed on both of their faces was awe inspiring. I knew they belonged together and getting to witness them become one was something I was humbled to be a part of it. Gladly taking Rose’s bouquet of red, yellow, and orange day lilies wrapped in a white ribbon, I watched as Emmett took her hands in his.

The ceremony itself was without a lot of pomp and circumstance. Rosalie and Emmett said the traditional vows with conviction. Dad and I gave them the rings that would rest on their fingers for the rest of their lives…and possibly after. They pledged themselves to each other, bringing tears to most of the guests’ eyes. I’d caught Edward staring at me a few times during the service. He’d wink, and I’d smile. Our exchange made me think that he was so sweet—the display was almost nauseating.

Emmett, being Emmett, picked Rose up off the ground during their first kiss as man and wife. She squealed, but it didn’t deter him. Most of the audience chuckled at his display, making Rose blush like a…well, like a blushing bride. I almost reprimanded him for embarrassing Rose, but I remembered that it was Emmett after all. He could have written his own vows, and that would have been much worse.

The newlywed couple broke apart and made their way down the aisle. Next, Charlie held out his arm. I took it, and we followed our friends arm in arm.

“You know, it wouldn’t upset this old man if you were the next one to do this.” His voice was just above a whisper.

I whipped my head toward him. “Oh, no. Don’t get any ideas. I am not ready for marriage, and I’m not sure I’ll ever be.”

“I thought you and Edward were a couple now?” Dad wrinkled his brow in confusion.

“We’re together…I guess you could say. We haven’t defined it, so I think the marriage talk is a little premature. Don’t you think?” I stared at him.

“Ah, hell. At the rate you two are going, your mom will never be a grandmother. You know she’ll take it out on me if you don’t produce one soon.” He bumped my shoulder with his.

“My father is actually telling his unwed daughter to get knocked up? Nice one, Dad,” I joked, giving him a sideways glance.

“Shut up. That’s not what I meant,” Charlie grumbled and turned red.

After all of the wedding party made their way to the back of the tent, we all split up to get in our cars. I looked around for Edward, since I’d planned on riding to the reception with him. Rising up on my tiptoes, I scanned the crowd. He was standing off to the side toward the middle of the tent, cornered by James. I decided to help my—I didn’t know what we were to each other at the moment—out and walked over to them.

“—such a beautiful service. I can’t wait until you and Indian Princess tie the knot. It’ll be the wedding of the century,” James blubbered into his white handkerchief lined with lace.

I rolled my eyes at his display. Like I’m letting you plan my wedding, you Fruit Loop.

“Hey,” I said lamely.

Edward turned around, noticing me. He wrapped his arm around my waist and squeezed. I laid my head back on his chest. James looked at us with pleading eyes.

“Can I ride to the reception with you guys?”

“No.” Edward deadpanned and looked away.

“Oh, come on, beef cake. I didn’t bring my car,” James whined with a pout.

“How the hell did you get here?” I tilted my head to the side.

“Jessica and Mike brought me. I need to hang out with her more. I adore her.” James let out a long, overdramatic sigh.

“Then go ride with them.” Edward waved toward the parking lot.

“And miss out on spending time with my two best friends and favorite baby makers? Surely you jest.” James twisted his lips up, looking like he’d sucked on a lemon.

He walked away from us, heading to the parking lot.

“Um, it might just be easier to give him a lift. He’ll try to drive you crazy and pout a lot more at the reception if we don’t.” I shot him a wide, toothy grin.

“Fuck. Fine.” Edward stomped off after James. I had to suppress the laughter that wanted to escape.
“Hey, Tinker Bell!” Edward yelled, cupping his hands around his mouth. “Don’t you dare take shot gun. I will use you for target practice if you do!”

As I was walking to Edward’s car, I noticed my cousin Leah was having a conversation with Jasper by her car. Huh. I didn’t even know he’d been invited. Nor did I know they had met. I watched as Jasper opened the driver’s side door for her, and then he climbed into the passenger’s side. I wasn’t sure how I felt about the two of them getting cozy because of his crappy friend status.

I will definitely be keeping my eye on those two.

Thankfully, James didn’t annoy Edward too much on the drive over to Downstairs where the reception was being held. Edward only had to smack James’ hand once in an attempt to take over the radio. I advised my flamboyant friend to not test my soldier’s patience. He seemed to get the message and was quiet the rest of the ride. Edward shot me a smile when he saw that James was going to cooperate.

Upon entering the bar, I smiled, proud of how the decorations had turned out. Mom, Dad, and I had worked after closing, transforming it into the perfect image of Emmett and Rosalie’s reception. On the tables in the main part of the bar, there had been white tablecloths draped over the tabletops. In the center, shallow bowls filled with water sat in the center, with petals mixed in and a floating candle on top.

The cake was setting a table in the back of the room, and a buffet style meal was laid out on the bar top. I tugged on Edward’s arm, and we went inside.

We seemed to be early, so there was plenty of the good stuff still available. Once we filled up our plates, we sat down at a table close waiting for the newlyweds to arrive. Edward pulled out the chair beside the one he had chosen, and I gratefully accepted.

“So, this is nice,” James nodded, looking from Edward to me.

“Can you not talk?” Edward rubbed his forehead. “I’m really hungry, and I don’t want your crazy ruining my appetite.”

I snickered.

“Baby, please don’t encourage him,” Edward pleaded with wide eyes.

“Aw, you guys are so cute.” James pulled out a disposable camera. “Say cheese!”

He snapped a picture, and I thought Edward was going to burst a vein.

“Will you stop it?” Edward gripped the table, making the veins in his hands strain. “Just…go sit somewhere else. I can’t be responsible for my actions if you say another word.”

James sighed, pocketing the camera. “Fine, but you’re no fun. Poo on you.”

James made the motions of zipping and locking his lips. Then, he started to eat.

“If it was only that fucking simple,” Edward muttered, shaking his head.

Rosalie and Emmett entered the bar, to the sound of catcalls and whistles. Rose’s face erupted into bright red blush when someone asked if they’d started the honeymoon on the way over. Emmett, unfazed like always, just smiled and said they’d stopped to take a few pictures. The room erupted in chuckles as he led his bride to the food, and then they sat down at a table close to us.

We ate in relative silence, well, for the most part. James would open his mouth to say something every once in a while, and Edward would stop him by pointing his fork at James and glaring at him. The action usually stopped whatever comment James was about to say dead. It made me think of what he’d be like when we had children.

Whoa.


Where the hell did that come from?

Damn my father for bringing up the grandchildren comment. He’s becoming as bad as Mom and James.

I blinked a couple of times, hoping the action would dislodge those thoughts. There was no way I was ready for anything like that yet. Edward noticed I had stopped eating and looked concerned.

“You okay?” he asked, staring at me intently.

“Uh, yeah. I’m fine.” I really hoped that he hadn’t somehow heard my thoughts. They would scare him off. I was kind of attached to him, so that would have made me sad.

Charlie stood up and clinked his glass a few tables away from us. Well, damn. I guess it was time for toasts.
“Can I have your attention?” He cleared his throat.

Everyone quieted down, setting their eyes on him.

“Now, as most of you know, I’m standing in today for my son, Jake. He was Emmett’s best friend and was a surrogate brother to Rosalie. I am honored that Emmett asked me to fill in. Thank you, boy.” Charlie wiped at his eye.

It was easy to feel the loss of my brother as Charlie said those words. Most of the guests tried to hide their reaction, but a few couldn’t contain how much it had affected them. I saw Emmett nod in my father’s direction, blinking his eyes. Rose had a tear that trickled down her cheek, and James had his head bowed. I think it hit Edward the hardest, because he pulled me close by the waist, burying his head into the crook of my neck. I reached up and ran my fingers through his hair. I hoped the action calmed him as I tried to hold in my own sadness.

Charlie blew out a breath. “This is supposed to be a happy day, though. I remember when Emmett was just a punk kid. Bella, Jake, and Emmett used to run around together, getting in to all kinds of trouble. I think the worst was the time they tried to experiment with the dryer when the boys were eight and Bella was six. I thought Sue was going to kill those kids when she discovered all of those chemicals in it. I swear…a green cloud rose out of it when she opened the door.”

Everyone chuckled. Edward raised his head, kissed me on the forehead, and turned back toward Charlie.

“I knew Emmett was in trouble the day I met Rose. Bella brought her home after school, and Rose made her entrance by tripping on the linoleum in the kitchen. Emmett, though, he’d been right there to catch her. Even before they started dating, he was always there to catch her. I don’t think Rose could have picked a more devoted man for her husband, and Emmett is just lucky that Rosie is a forgiving soul.”

The sounds of snickering and laughter reverberated through the room.

“Anyway, congratulations to the both of you. May you have a happy marriage. I want to leave you with two pieces of advice. Never go to bed angry, because the wife will definitely not have sex with you then.” Charlie raised his glass and smirked.

“I can’t believe you said that!” Mom smacked Dad on the ass, causing the room to erupt in laughter.

“Ow, woman. I’m trying to give a speech here,” He rubbed the spot she’d hit.

“And two.” Dad mock-glared at Mom. She blew him a kiss, making him chuckle. I shook my head in disgust, because watching my parents’ foreplay was disturbing.

“Saying, Yes dear, I love you, or, I’m sorry, will almost always get you out of trouble when you piss the wife off. If that doesn’t work, though, flowers are always a man’s best secret weapon.” Dad covered his head as he sat down, because Mom was glaring at him. I stood up, clearing my throat to start my speech. Well, and also to save my dad from my mother’s wrath.

Everyone turned and looked at me.

“I’m a single girl, so I don’t have advice for the happy couple. Instead, I’d like to say that I’ve never met two people who deserved to be together more than Emmett and Rosalie. Watching the two of them fall in love and stay in love has been a wonderful experience. Because of them, I firmly believe there is one perfect someone out there for all of us.” I looked down at Edward as I spoke the last sentence.

Looking back up, I continued.

“So, may you be blessed with love and happiness. I love you both…so much.” I couldn’t contain the tears of happiness any longer and let them go. Rose stood up, walking over and embracing me.

“Thank you, Bella. I love you, too,” Rose whispered in my ear.

~.~.~.~

The rest of the night was more lighthearted. Because of the smallness of the bar, there really was no room for a dance floor. Instead, people paired off into groups, talking and laughing. It was just the type of celebration that was fitting for my two best friends—completely laid back and simple.

I stayed with Edward the entire time. We made our way around the room, talking to various guests.

“So, that was some speech,” Jessica said when we reached her.

“Yeah, well, it was the truth.” I shrugged, slightly uncomfortable with the praise.

“Bella is so rude sometimes. I don’t think we’ve been properly introduced. I’m Jessica Newton, and this idiot behind me is my husband, Mike.” She chuckled, holding out her hand to Edward for a handshake. I smirked at her, shaking my head.

“Why do you always have to put me down, Jess?” Mike whined, crossing his arms. “Sometimes I don’t think you really love me.”

Jessica turned toward her husband. “Oh, can it. You should be thankful I married your boring ass. I mean, really. I’m surprised you haven’t started growing mold on your ass from sitting in that grungy recliner all the time.”

He rolled his eyes at her.

Edward laughed, taking her proffered hand. “It’s nice to meet you both.”

“Everyone, eyes up here,” James called out, clinking his spoon on his water glass. He was standing on the cleared off bar.

“What the hell is that weirdo doing now?” Edward closed his eyes and tugged at his hair.

“Oh, he drives you crazy, too?” Mike moved over to Edward’s other side.

“Yeah, he tried to get Bella and me together for weeks,” Edward replied with a grimace.

“Fuuuuck,” Mike muttered, shaking his head. “Well, good luck with that. He’s relentless when he decides you’re one half of the perfect couple. He badgered Jess and me until we gave up.”

“Oh, you gave up, did you?” Jess crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes. “Well, I guess you have a date with your hand tonight.”

“But, baby.” Mike held out his arms.

“Please, I have a surprise for the newlyweds,” James called out.

A hush fell over the crowd, giving James their full attention.

“Thank you,” James smiled, clasping his hands in front of him. “When I found out Rosie and her sweetums were getting married, I looked and looked for the perfect gift. How do you put a price on love, though? Well, I learned that you don’t. So, instead, I have written a poem in dedication to the love that two of my closest friends share. I’d like to share it with them and all of you now.”

“I’ll give you a hundred dollars, right now, if you get down and forget about the damn poem!” Dad cupped his hands around his mouth.

“Oh, Papa Swan.” James shook his head, an indulgent grin spreading across his face. “You can’t put a price on a masterpiece.”

“One fifty.” Charlie’s voice echoed through the bar.

“But…but…I wrote it for them. I can’t take your money.”

“Two hundred cash, right now.” Dad pointed toward the floor.

“I want to read it!” James stomped his foot.

“Damn it, I can’t believe I’m doing this, but I’ll give you two hundred dollars, and...I’ll…letyougivemeamakeover.” Charlie said, rushing out the last part.

James jumped down from the bar, skipping toward my father with his hands behind his back.

“What was that?” James leaned in and cupped his hand around his ear.

“I’ll let you give me a damn makeover!” Dad’s face turned purple.

James winked at my dad. “Oh, getting you into some clothes that would show off all your assets is worth it.”
James left my dad and began mingling with some of the other guests. Edward and I walked over to my dad. When we reached him, he was muttering under his breath.

“Are you okay? Why would you do that?” Edward blurted out, looking at my dad like he was crazy.

“Listen, son. You’ve never heard the horror that is James’ original poems. I have, and I’ll be damned if I’m ever subjected to one again. Don’t judge me.” He leveled Edward with a pointed gaze and then went over to my mom.

“Do you…?” Edward turned to me.

“No, James has never shared his poetry with me before. I have no idea,” I stared after my father, wrinkling my brow.

“Well, if Charlie is willing to be made over by the fairy, then it has to be bad,” Edward said with a shudder.
I noticed that Rose and Emmett only had a few people surrounding them and decided to go talk to them. Pulling Edward with me, I walked over.

“Oh, you both look so happy,” I said as Emmett grabbed me and picked me up into a tight embrace.
“Thanks so much for all your help. We couldn’t have done it without you,” Emmett muttered into my ear.

He put me down, and Edward stepped forward.

“I, uh, got you guys a gift. I wanted to give it to you guys myself, so uh…”
Edward reached into the pocket of his pants, pulling out a long white envelope. He handed it to Emmett, looking nervous. Emmett opened it and looked inside, and then he looked back at Edward in shock.
“I just thought you two could use a trip to somewhere romantic. The tickets are open ended, so you can go whenever you want.” Edward prattled on nervously.

“What’s in it?” Rosalie angled her body toward her husband, trying to see inside the envelope.
“Babe, it’s…uh…we’re going to Vancouver,” Emmett blew out a breath, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Vancouver?” Rose looked at Edward and then back to Emmett.

Emmett handed Rosalie the envelope. When he was sure it was secured in her hand, he reached over and pulled Edward into a hug.

“Man, you don’t know what this means to us. We really couldn’t afford to take a honeymoon, so we were just going to spend the time we got off work here. There is no way I can ever repay you for this. Thank you.” Emmett released Edward, patting him on the shoulder.

“It really wasn’t a problem. You guys welcomed me here when I first came and made me feel at home. It was the least I could do.” Edward stared at the ground.

Emmett nodded with tears in his eyes. “Still, thank you.”

Rosalie grabbed a hold of Edward for a hug next, causing him to chuckle. “Oh my God. You are the best. I am so glad you weren’t a stalker!”

Edward laughed and released her. “Yeah, me, too. Now you can look forward to two weeks in Vancouver.”
They both thanked him again before they were called over to cut the wedding cake. I wrapped my arm around Edward’s waist, pulling him closer.

“That was a good thing you did, Edward. I didn’t know they weren’t taking a honeymoon. I guess your present wasn’t too much after all,” I said softly.

“See, I know what I’m doing. Well, sometimes.” Edward pulled me closer.

“Sure you do.”

The feeling of a hand on my back made me turn around. Leah and Jasper were standing behind me.
“You know, it’s really sad that it seems the only time I can get down to the bar is when it’s closed. If I thought Uncle Charlie would let me take your place, I’d totally try to bribe you or something.” Leah raised her eyebrows.

I chuckled. “Fat chance, cousin. You know that Mom and I would kill each other if we worked together. All she’d do is bitch at me for measuring wrong, or not cooking something right, and then we’d have to throw down in the parking lot. No thanks.”

I heard Edward’s laughter behind me.

“Oh, according to Jess I’m a rude bitch. Have you met Edward yet?” I placed my hand on his chest.

“No, I haven’t. I see now why we don’t hang out much anymore, whore,” she said, giving me a mock glare.
I smiled.

“I’m Leah Clearwater, the prettier cousin.” Leah held her hand out to Edward. He took it, shaking it.

“Pleasure to meet you. However, you’re wrong. I think I got the prettiest cousin.” Edward smirked, putting his arm around my shoulder.

“You’re catching on, cutie. Compliments are a step in the right direction for getting into a girl’s panties.” A wicked grin spread across Leah’s face.

Edward flushed and looked down. If I wasn’t ready to kill my cousin, I would have laughed.

“Damn, Leah. Minding your own business is just too much of a chore, isn’t it?” I asked in a sarcastic voice.
“Shut up. You love me and would die a horrible, miserable death without me.”

“Yeah, I’d dance on your grave, slut. Where are your dad and brother, anyway?”

Leah snorted. “Oh, Seth stayed behind to babysit Dad. He hit the firewater too hard last night. Plus, Uncle Charlie paid us fifty bucks each to keep the old man away from the ceremony today. He said that he couldn’t handle another one of Dad’s bonding rituals.”

“Uh, yeah. I think Daddy would have had a heart attack if Uncle Harry had done one.”

I looked behind me and saw that Jasper and Edward were engaged in their own conversation. I still wasn’t sure how I felt about the prick. It was nice to see that he was trying so hard to regain some sort of friendship with Edward, but the way Jasper treated Edward before he left for basic training still grated at me. I couldn’t understand how someone who was supposed to be a best friend could do that. Even if it was to placate some high maintenance bitch he loved.

The calls for everyone to look at the cake table silenced my thoughts. Edward, Leah, Jasper, and I moved closer to the couple. We stopped when we were standing to the side, right in the front.

Emmett and Rose stood there behind the cake. People Ooo’ed and Ahh’ed over the confection. It was a large four tiered cake with three large tiers on top and a wide, thinner base at the bottom. The cake had lots of flowers colored in red, orange, and yellow outlining each top section. On the sides, strips of the same colors were placed all around. It was a monstrosity of a cake, but it had been the only thing Rosalie had let Emmett have total control over. I tried to talk her out of it, but she wouldn’t hear of it.

They both held the cake knife in their hands. Rose had to lean slightly forward to reach, and when she did, she lost her balance. I watched in horror as she tried to catch herself, flailing and falling right into the cake. Emmett pulled her out, and she was covered in icing and chocolate cake. Tears began falling from her eyes while she turned beet red. No one spoke a word, knowing the situation was not funny.

Emmett looked to the cake, back at Rose, and then back to the cake again. He tossed the knife that was still in his hand behind him. Pushing her to the side, he took a deep breath and took a step back.

“Cannonball!” Emmett jumped right onto the table and into the cake. The impact of his dive caused the table to buckle. It broke, sending Emmett to the floor with the cake underneath him. When he stood up, he was covered in icing and cake. All that was left of the beautiful cake was clumps on the floor.

“I can lick that off you if you want, you know. I am very efficient with my tongue,” James called out from the other side of the room.

The crowd gathered around burst into laughter. Emmett guffawed, walking over to his bride.

“See, baby. No need to be embarrassed. I’ll gladly make an ass out of myself to take everyone’s eyes off your clumsiness.” I heard Emmett say to Rosalie. I caught her eye, winking. She smiled and then kissed Emmett.

~.~.~.~

After the mishap with the cake, the party wound down. I let Rose and Emmett use my apartment to get cleaned up and delegated the task of removing the cake from the bar’s floor to others. Jasper had volunteered, and it had amused me. I had a feeling he was trying to get on my good side. It was funny, but it was going to take more than cleaning up cake to make me warm up to his ass.

Everyone had gone outside to wish the couple farewell when they left. They were going to go home and pack, so they could go to Vancouver the next day. With another hug, they thanked Edward again for his generosity. And again, Edward waved them off and told them that he owed them for their kindness. Seeing Edward get along with my friends and family had done funny things to me. I felt like, for the first time, I had finally done something right by choosing to let him in.

Once we had changed and showered the day away, Edward and I met back up in my apartment. The feeling we hadn’t really gotten to see much of each other at the wedding and reception had been mutual, so we decided a night in was a good way to correct it.

“Mmmmm. That feels so good,” I purred.

“Well, I’ll do this anytime you want.” The seductive tone in his voice was hard to miss.

I made a noncommittal sound.

It was official—Edward gave the best foot massages on the planet. The way those large hands and nimble fingers worked the muscles on the bottom of my foot felt divine.

There was a show on the television that neither of us were really watching. Instead, we talked as he rubbed my feet. That had started from a comment about how uncomfortable my shoes had been. Just when I thought Edward couldn’t possibly get better in my eyes, he went and topped it. I wasn’t blind to his flaws—far from it. However, he was proving that he was in a league above the other men I’d dated.

“I’m going to get something to drink.” I could feel the lust building, and I needed a distraction before I did something stupid. “Do you want something?”

“Uh, sure.” He looked at me funny.

I nodded and pulled my feet out of his lap. Walking into the kitchen, I opened the fridge to look at my choices. I stood there a few moments, trying to decide.

A pair of arms wrapped around me. I melted back into Edward’s body, relishing in the contact.

“What do we have?” he asked in a low voice.

“Um, there’s water, juice, milk, soda…”

His hands had moved from my waist to my hips, sending heat through my body. I shut the door and turned to look at him.

“I can make you something to eat, if you’re hungry instead,” I walked away from him—my body screaming in protest. As I reached up to open the cupboard, he pressed me against the counter.

“I’m hungry…but not for food,” he breathed in my ear, the warm air sending shivers down my spine.
I’d been a good girl—really, I had. When he’d slept in my bed the night I’d been scared my ex was breaking in, I hadn’t jumped him. However, a gal can only take so much of the sexy soldier before she’d crack. And I’d reached my breaking point.

I pushed my backside into him, feeling his erection. I moved against him and caused him to moan.

“What do you want then?” I asked, loving how he felt against me.

He spun me around, crashing his lips to mine. I fisted his shirt and pulled him closer. Losing myself in the kiss, I barely noticed I was being lifted onto a hard surface. I broke away, panting.

“Not here.” There was no way in hell we were having sex for the first time in the kitchen. There was a bunch of crap on the counter, and I wasn’t willing to get my ass stabbed or something.

“Where?” He began running open-mouthed kisses down my neck.

“Bedroom.”

Edward hooked his arms under my thighs and lifted me, turning toward the bedroom. A moan escaped my lips as he laid me down on the bed. As we began removing our clothes in between small kisses, I noticed his eyes. They were full of desire—desire for me. I’d never felt so wanted, and it made me feel powerful to know I could make him feel that way.

His hands ran a slow and torturous path across my navel, over my stomach, and under my breasts. My back arched in pleasure as a soft sigh escaped me and my eyes closed. The man was slowly killing me with foreplay.

When my eyes opened again, I noticed he was kneeling between my open legs with his boxers still on. That just wouldn’t do. I was lying before him, completely naked and ready to be fucked senseless. I wasn’t going to let Edward sit there and stare at me like some creepy stalker. Rising up, I tugged on them, hoping he’d understand my silent plea.

He leaned over the bed, grabbing his pants and tossing a foil packet on the bed. It wasn’t long before the last piece of fabric between us was gone, and Edward was covering my body with his. His kisses were frantic and needy.

“I wish I could be a gentleman and take things slow.” Edward palmed my breast, eliciting a moan from me. “But you’re too goddamn beautiful to resist.”

His eyes raked over my body as he opened and removed the condom from the packet. I watched impatiently as he rolled the latex over his engorged dick, making sure it was on correctly. Edward gripped his shaft and gave it a few pumps, before I’d had enough.

I reached up and grabbed the back of his neck, pulling him toward me. Edward collapsed on top of me, pressing against me and capturing my mouth in a heated kiss. I felt his hand graze my opening as his tongue tangled with mine.

He pulled away from my lips. “So fucking wet. I—I can’t. Please tell me you want this.”

Edward looked at me, showing me the desperation in his eyes. I leaned up, taking his ear into my mouth and sucking on it hard. Taking that as confirmation, he slammed his cock into me. A loud moan escaped from me.
He started thrusting, filling me up. I could feel the first indications of pleasure ripple through my core.

“Oh, God. You feel so—Uhhhhhhhhhh.”

He slammed into me one last time and then stilled. I watched as his face contorted and tensed.

No.


Nononononononono.


Motherfucker.

Edward collapsed on top of me with his full weight. He was panting.

“Shit, I’m so fucking sorry. I don’t know what the fuck happened,” he said, rolling off of me.

I stared up at the ceiling, cursing my luck.

Fuck you, universe. I know he can’t be perfect…but damn. Couldn’t you have given him a third nipple, or a speech impediment, instead of making him a minute man? I mean, really?

“Please…just say something. The silence is killing me,” Edward pleaded, throwing his arm over his eyes.

I looked over at Edward, lying beside me. I felt really bad for him, but I was a little pissed, too. He’d gotten off while I was still horny as hell.

“It’s okay. It happens to lots of guys.” I tried to sound like I wasn’t dying of lust.

He groaned, moving his arm and looking at me. “This shit has never happened to me, I swear. It’s just been a long time since I’ve…well, you know.”

I pecked his lips and chuckled. “It’s fine, really. I’m just going to hop in the shower. I’ll be right back.”

I got up and walked out of the room. I know leaving him on the bed was a crappy thing to do, but I needed a moment to deal with the disappointment I was feeling. In a way, I’d kind of built up what our first time would be like in my head. Letting him know how I was feeling would have only made him feel worse, and I didn’t want that.

I made my way into the bathroom and started the shower. When it was ready, I stepped under the spray. I washed my hair and body, trying to relax and ignore the ache in my lower regions. It was useless, though. Edward had gotten me worked up, and the only way it was going to go away is if I finished myself off.
I imagined Edward and all the things that should have happened as I swirled my finger around my clit. I was so into it, I didn’t hear Edward enter the shower. I jumped when I felt his hand pull mine away from my nub.

“You know,” he whispered into my ear. “All you had to do was ask. I know I was a huge disappointment, but hell baby, I would have eaten you out until you screamed my name.”

His words made me shiver.

“Are you finished with me? Or are you going to let me prove I can make you come.”

His fingers took over the work, pumping in and out of me, while his thumb worked my clit. I was so worked up, it didn’t take long for me to see stars.

“Fuck,” Edward said, watching as I shook with release, crying out in pleasure. Exhausted, I slumped against him.

We washed each other, stealing kisses and touches every so often. Afterwards, as we lay in my bed together, I realized I still loved the man even though he’d basically turned out to be a two pump chump. Falling asleep in his arms, the last thought that came to mind was there had to be a way to overcome his problem.

Right?

~.~.~.~

The next morning, Edward had left not long after we woke up. I was sure he was embarrassed about the night before. I’d already come to terms with it and was determined to find a way to fix it. I was nothing if not persistent. He left me with a kiss before leaving.

Later that day, before it was time to go to work, there was a knock at my door. Thinking it might be Edward, I stopped dusting and went to answer it. However, my sexy soldier was not on the other side of the door. It was motherfucking James.

I am so not in the mood for his ass.

“Good afternoon, Indian princess” Before I could tell James to go away, he marched into my apartment carrying a laptop. He sat down on my couch, making himself comfortable. I glared at him as he opened it up.

“I’ve been doing some research, and I’ve found a lot of interesting information. Did you know that you can track your ovulation by taking your basal body temperature every day?”

Oh, good God.

“You use this special thermometer and chart it. Now, you have to do this in the morning right after you wake up, and I’m willing to sleep at the end of your bed to make sure it’s done…” He continued to stare at the screen.

“Get out.” I flopped down on the couch next to him.

“Oh, well, if you’d rather have Mr. Perfect do it, I can show him how. I am going to keep a document with all of the information, though.” His eyes dared me to argue.

I winced, remembering the night before. James noticed, unfortunately, and leaned toward me.

“You know, you should be much happier now that you and wonder cock are getting it on.” He studied my face. I turned my head away from him.

He let out a shocked gasp. “Nooooooo.”

“I’m not saying anything. Just…just go away.” I covered my face.

“Oh, no. This is a tragedy of epic proportions. It’s such a waste that soldier boy is such a huge disappointment in the bedroom.”

“James.” I moved my hands and narrowed my eyes at him.

“I would have never guessed,” he muttered, shaking his head in disbelief.

I was about to drag him out the door. He was really starting to piss me off.

“I need to know the exact problem, princess. That way, we can find the right solution.” James started clicking frantically on his keyboard. When I didn’t answer, he looked at me expectantly.

“I’m waiting.” He pursed his lips.

“I…it was fine, James. Great even. I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I lied, unable to look him in the eye.

“Fine. I’m not the one who will have to live with sexual frustration,” he sang, his tone saying he didn’t believe me for a second.

I thought over my options. Edward had said his problem wasn’t something he’d ever experienced before. I was well aware, though, guys lied about shit like that all the time. I really, really wanted to be with him, but the cracked out diva was right. Living with sexual frustration would probably kill me and most definitely turn me into a shrew. I sighed, deciding to bite the bullet and swallow my fucking pride.

This is going to hurt…so much.

“I really hate you; I hope you know,” I complained, James looking at me expectantly. “Fine, yes, we slept together for the first time last night, and it…uh…wasn’t that great.”

“Whoa, wait a minute.” James stood up and placed his computer on the cushion. “You mean to tell me last night was the first time? What the hell is wrong with you? I’d have hit that long ago.”

“Well, not all of us are as awesome as you,” I said sarcastically.

“Sweet pea, no one is as awesome as me. Trying is just going to kill your self-esteem,” James said, patting my knee.

“Oh, fuck you,” I retorted, shoving his hand away. “I’m ten seconds away from kicking your ass. Are you helping me or not?”

“Yes. Tell Auntie James the problem.”James returned to his seat, picking back up his laptop.

Gritting my teeth, I told him about our failed attempt the night before. James listened and then went to his computer. He looked through a few sites until he found what he was looking for. He turned the screen toward me.

“Okay, so I’m thinking we should start with either a cock ring or some kind of numbing gel. This, of course, is a short-term solution. What I think he should really do is work on his kegel muscles. If he can control those, then that should take care of the problem,” he advised with a nod.

“Kegel muscles?”

“Both of you are hopeless,” James threw himself backwards into the couch cushions with a whine. “All I want is a niece or nephew to spoil. However, I’m never going to get one. I was good when I was a child. Why am I being punished?”

“Just because you might be able to improve the quality of my love life doesn’t mean I’m getting pregnant.”

“That’s what you think.”

I decided to ignore his last comment. He was willing to help me, and I figured letting him live in his delusional world for the moment was a small price to pay. I listened as he gave me some other pointers. It was shocking, to say the least, when I realized James really did know what he was talking about. Huh.

“Do you need anything else?”

“Um, no,” I said as James stood up, carrying his laptop and walking toward the door.

I looked over at the clock, realizing it was almost time for work. Edward, James, and I were supposed to be working the next shift together. Suddenly, asking the diva for advice didn’t seem like the best idea.

“Wait,” I called out. He stopped and looked at me.

“I thought you said…”

“You can’t say anything to Edward. He’ll be so upset if you do. Please, promise me you won’t,” I begged, grabbing his shoulders.

“I don’t know.”

“I’ll let you be the godfather of my first child if you keep your mouth shut.”

James squealed. “Oh, Indian Princess. Of course I won’t say anything.”

I smiled at him, feeling better I’d avoided that hurdle.

“I have to start looking for Christening outfits. Baby Cullen deserves only the best.”

He practically skipped out of my door and into his apartment. I walked over, shut the door, and sat back down on the couch. I almost felt sorry for him.

Almost.

What he didn’t realize was Edward and I were probably never going to have children, so his hopes were eventually going to be crushed. It was just too horrific to imagine what the diva would do to it. So, bringing a kid into the world just wasn’t worth it.

Oh, well. He’d get over it eventually, I thought.