Stranger-in-Town

The bed bumped against the wall repeatedly, making the ugly-ass, framed art print shake and dance on its little nail. Loud moans rang out along with a high-pitched scream. She was definitely a screamer, which she had demonstrated over and over during the night. I desperately wished she was also into gags or something, because I was going out of my goddamn mind listening to that shit.

“Shut the fuck up!” I yelled through the wall. It wasn’t the first time, so I doubted it would do any good this time, either. Maybe I should have kicked their door in and snapped some photos of the noisy couple. In all probability, at least one of them was cheating on a spouse, and all cheaters should just roast in hell.

10/28/2011

Stranger in Town

 

1 1/2 oz.(44 ml) Light Rum

1/2 oz.(15ml) Sweet Vermouth

1/2 oz.(15 ml) Calvados

1 maraschino cherry

Mixing Instructions:

In a mixing glass half-filled with ice cubes, combine the rum, vermouth, Calvados, and cherry brandy. Stir well. Strain into a cocktail glass and garnish with the cherry.

Bartender's Guide suggests serving in a cocktail glass

Chapter 5 Teaser #2 (NSFW)

The bed bumped against the wall repeatedly, making the ugly-ass, framed art print shake and dance on its little nail. Loud moans rang out along with a high-pitched scream. She was definitely a screamer, which she had demonstrated over and over during the night. I desperately wished she was also into gags or something, because I was going out of my goddamn mind listening to that shit.

Chapter 5 Teaser

There was a knock on the door. I smiled wider – there was a knock on my door. My smile was replaced with a mixture of a snort and sheer horror when I opened it, though. Outside stood James. It wasn’t the fact that he was there that was shocking – he did live right across from me, after all. What was shocking was his attire. A maroon housecoat, bare legs, and fluffy bunny slippers. He was holding a stack of DVDs and a large container of popcorn.

“Hello, neighbor sex-on-legs,” he greeted me and filled his mouth with popcorn.

“Um, hi…” I replied slowly.

“It’s time for that Tom Cruise marathon,” he told me and breezed past me into the apartment. “Ooh, I love the drapes! Mama Swan has excellent taste. Can I try the bed? I am an excellent judge of beds.”

Absolutely Screwed

I blinked, trying to adjust my eyes to the blackness. In every direction I turned, there was nothing. I wanted to run, scream, and leave that awful place, but I wasn’t sure which way to go. The absence of light made it impossible to see where I was.

The sensation of someone standing behind me crept up my spine. Two strong arms grabbed me from behind, holding me in a vice grip against a hot, muscular chest. I could feel his scalding breath against my neck and knew there was no use in fighting—it would only lead to pain.

10/19/2011

Absolutely Screwed

1/2 oz(15 ml.) Orange Juice

1/2 oz. (15 ml.) Absolut Mandarin

Mixing Instructions:

Mix Orange Juice and Mandarin Vodka, then enjoy.

Bartender's guide suggests serving in a shot glass

Chapter 4 Teaser #2

“Ooooh, Charlieeeeeeeeeee!” A shrill female voice pierced the air.

“Why, God? Why? What did I do to you?” Charlie muttered under his breath.

The Dragon Lady herself walked up to the bar and sat on the stool. She tossed her frizzy light brown hair behind her shoulder, batting her eyelashes in a way that probably was supposed to look sexy. Instead, it came across more like she was having a seizure. The woman grabbed a hold of my dad’s forearm and squeezed lightly, making him jerk it back.

“Aw, come on, baby. Don’t be like that.” she leaned forward, pushing her breasts out.

“Um, I have to, um…yeah. I think the new guy needs me—James, get your ass down here, now!” he called out, backing away quickly.

Chapter 4 Teaser

“Hey, Flanagan!” I called out, cupping my hand around my mouth. “I think you have the bottle drop mastered, so maybe it’s time to learn how to toss them.”

A blank stare crossed his face, and I knew he had no idea what I was talking about.

“Please tell me he knows the hotness that is Tom Cruise in Cocktail,” James demanded from behind me. “Oh, shit. He really has no clue. Oh, baby cakes, it looks like a Tom Cruise marathon is in both our futures.”

All of the color drained from Mr. Terrified-of-the-Diva’s face, and he turned back to the customers.

“Nice, James,” I said, holding up my hand for a high-five. He complied and went back to work. God, working with James and Edward was such a blast.

Diva

 EPOV

The diner was everything I expected of a small town diner. Black and white checkered floor, red leather seats on the stools and chairs, apple pie on the counter. Then there were the unexpected things, like the fact that it was in an old train station, and that there was military memorabilia on the walls. A photo of Jake in his fatigues, smiling widely, behind the counter knocked the breath out of me and made me forget everything else for a moment. I hadn’t seen a picture of him since he’d died, and he looked so alive and so vibrant in the photo. How the hell could someone like him just be gone?

“You look a little lost, son. What can I get you?”

10/7/2011

Diva

1 1/2 oz. (44 ml.) Absolut Vodka

1/2 oz. (15 ml.) Passion fruit juice

1/2 oz. (15 ml.) Lime juice

1 tblsp (20 ml.) Maraschino cherry juice

Fill with 7-Up

Mixing Instructions: 

Pour and build in a tall glass or collins glass. Fill with 7-up. Garnish with cherry and lime.

Bartender's guide suggests using a Collins glass

Chapter 3 Teaser #2

The diner was everything I expected of a small town diner. Black and white checkered floor, red leather seats on the stools and chairs, apple pie on the counter. Then there were the unexpected things, like the fact that it was in an old train station, and that there was military memorabilia on the walls. A photo of Jake in his fatigues, smiling widely, behind the counter knocked the breath out of me and made me forget everything else for a moment. I hadn’t seen a picture of him since he’d died, and he looked so alive and so vibrant in the photo. How the hell could someone like him just be gone?

“You look a little lost, son. What can I get you?”

Chapter 3 Teaser

“So, cuddle muffin. Are you really a soldier like Papa Swan said?” James asked me when there was a quiet moment between customers.

“I used to be,” I replied and took a drink from my water bottle. I was kind of missing patrols right about then.

“Really? Do you still have your uniform?” he asked and leaned back against the counter next to me. “Wait, what kind of soldier? Thanks to Tom Cruise, I kind of prefer Navy Dress Whites. Yummy! Although fatigues are kind of hot, too. I’d give my left nut for a soldier to call my own. Okay, maybe not my actual left nut, but you know what I mean. Got any buddies who are taking the whole don’t ask, don’t tell thing to the extreme?”

“Um…yes, no, Army, and not that I know off,” I replied. “There are customers waiting.”

James frowned. “Don’t think we won’t be returning to this conversation, lamb chop.”

I entertained myself with thoughts of lamb chopping James’ ass with a butcher knife until we closed.